Do you want to be able to get a guy to admit he likes you without having to ask him?
Maybe he’s your best guy pal and you are hoping beyond hope that it will turn into something more. Perhaps he’s a colleague who makes your heart go pitter-patter every time he asks you a question about an upcoming project. Maybe he’s a barista at your favorite coffee shop, and even though the froth on the cappuccinos is lacking, he makes you feel all hot and steamy.
Whoever it may be, if there’s a guy in your life that you have feelings for and you’re hoping his feelings are mutual, you could certainly come right out and ask him. But, if that approach feels a bit brash, there are ways that you can get the guy you are curious about to come clean and admit that he, too, feels the same way about you. How? Here are some tips that you can use to nudge a confession of feelings out of the guy you are digging without being obvious.
Build Up His Trust in You
Even if the guy you are crushing on is crushing back on you, he may not be willing to come right out and tell you. In fact, just like you, sharing his feelings may make him feel a bit awkward. He may just be too shy. If you ever hope to hear him say the words, “I’m into you” or “Hey, do you want to go out sometime?” the first thing you have to do is build up his trust in you.
Just like women, men need to feel a sense of trust in someone before they share their emotions. Opening up can be really hard for a lot of guys, and many of them aren’t willing to divulge such personal information unless they feel like they can trust the other person. Think about it: like you, he may be thinking to himself, “I’m really into this girl and would love to take it to the next level, but what if I share my feelings with her and she squashes my heart? “If he sees that you’re trustworthy, he’ll be way more inclined to open up. Remember though, building his trust isn’t going to happen overnight; it takes time. So, start working on building that trust; prove your reliability and eventually, he may just divulge his feelings for you.
Be a Good Listener
Don’t take this the wrong way, but ladies tend to talk a lot; especially when they are crushing on a guy. Whether it’s because they are nervous and don’t want there to be any awkward silence or because they are afraid that if they don’t say enough the guy they are interested in won’t be impressed and reciprocate feelings of “liking”; whatever the reason, if you’re trying to get a guy to admit that you like you, avoid the temptation to over-talk.
We’re not saying that you shouldn’t talk at all, because of course you should; but what we are saying is that you should consciously slow down on the talking and listen more. Believe it or not, guys do like to talk; maybe not as much as women, but they do enjoy telling stories and sharing tidbits of information about themselves. Plus, if they aren’t able to get a word in edgewise, how is the guy you are feeling going to try to impress YOU? Talking less and listening more will also afford the opportunity to build trust in you (see tip #1), which will increase the chances that he will eventually share his true feelings for you. So, if you want a dude that you are into – and who is into you – to ever tell you that he likes you, put your listening ears on!
Prompt a Conversation
While it’s true that guys do like to talk (if you let them), some men are a little nervous about getting a conversation going; or they just don’t know how to spark one. They might feel as if they have nothing important to say, or that they just won’t capture the attention of the lady they are digging. Plus, many dudes are so accustomed to not saying much around the ladies because they are so used to not getting a word in edgewise.
Communication is the key to a healthy relationship, and if you ever want the guy you are crushing on to admit that he likes you than you are going to have to encourage communication. Prompt conversations; ask him questions; not questions about you, but questions about him or questions that would just encourage him to share his thoughts.
Need some help? Here are some examples of bad and good questions and conversation starters:
- o “How do you think I look in this outfit?”
- o “What do you think I should do?”
- o “Where is your favorite place to hang out and why?”
- o “Which flavor do you prefer: chocolate or vanilla? Share three reasons why you prefer that flavor.”
Asking him questions about himself is definitely a key to getting him to opening up; but, it’s not enough. You also want to make sure that you give him the opportunity to really answer whatever questions you’ve asked him. Prompting a conversation won’t do much good if you only let the guy get a few words in and then completely take over. However, if it seems like he is just giving one- or two-word answers, some talking on your part can help to encourage him to open up more; for instance, you could ask him additional questions that prompt him to divulge more information.
Encouraging conversations will help to foster more trust in you and get him to talk more; all things that you want to establish if you ever want your crush to admit that he likes you.
So many ladies have the tendency to take on this odd persona when they are interested in a guy. Again, this isn’t intended to be offensive, but it’s the truth (admit it, you know that you’ve probably tried to be someone you aren’t when you are around the guy you like). Why the change in personality? It’s likely because they feel like their real personas aren’t very interesting or appealing, and therefore, the guy that they are interested in won’t be into them. Therefore, they make tweaks to their personalities in order to impress the guy, which would then make her more interesting; and if she’s more interesting, it’s more likely that the guy she is crushing on will like her, too.
But here’s the thing: if you’re changing your personality, the guy isn’t going to get to know the real you. And while your “alter” personality may be interesting and may grab the attention of the man that you want to have a relationship with, in the long run, it isn’t going to do you any good. Eventually, your real personality is going to come out, and when he finds out who you really are, he’s probably going to be taken off-guard and any trust that he developed in you will be crushed – and so will your relationship. Plus, do you really want a relationship with someone who doesn’t like the real you? Trust us; maintaining your “enhanced” personality is going to get pretty exhausting, and pretty quick.
Be yourself. Don’t embellish anything. If you’re a vegetarian, don’t pretend that you like meat; if your favorite color is purple, don’t pretend that it’s blue; if you like country music, don’t pretend that you’re hip-hop’s #1 fan. Do you; if the guy is really into you and worth your while, he’s going to be interested in you, and he’s going to like you for YOU!
Don’t be Overbearing
You know the saying, “absence make the heart grow fonder”? Well, it exists for a reason. Think about it; if you’re always around something or someone, you aren’t going to be as excited about it. Like, if you always eat the same thing day in and day out – even if it’s your absolute favorite meal – eventually, it isn’t going to be very appealing. In fact, you may even grow to hate that meal. The same idea can be applied to you and the guy the you are crushing on; if you’re always around, he’s never going to have the opportunity to miss you. Plus you don’t want to seem too needy. Believe it or not, when he misses you, he’s going to want you more; and when he wants you more, the chances of him admitting that he’s into you will increase.
Summing It Up
If you’re crushing on a guy and you desperately want to take it to the next level, these tips can help make it happen. By establishing his trust in you, being a good listener, prompting a conversation, being YOU, and by being absent once in a while (or more!), if the guy you are crushing on is into you, eventually, he will open up and admit the true feelings that he has for you.